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The real bad times start on January 23. Alice becomes aware that she is addicted, she knows that she can´t leave it any more. (Quotation, page 72: "After you have had it, there isn´t even life without drugs. It´s a prodding, colourless, dissonant bare existence. It stinks. And I´m glad I´m back.") She relapses and smokes joints again; it´s such a beautiful, wonderful, great feeling and for this reason she´s delighted she´s turned on again. Some days later she asks Lane to get her uppers. One day the police raids Chris´s house and catch the two girls taking drugs. But when they pretend that it is their very first time they don´t get any trouble. Alice´s parents become suspicious of her using uppers again and insist her to see the doctor. She refuses and so her family starts controlling her whatever she does and wherever she goes and send her to a psychiatrist (she calls him "headshrinker"). in secret she takes pills like "co-pilots" every day to have this great feeling of being full of herself.
In March she runs away from home once again and lives with a couple of kids in Denver. She has reached the stage where she would do nearly everything to get her acid. One day she wakes up in the street and runs a fever, but she can´t find any of her friends to ask them for help. Alice is so desperated that she goes to church and asks a priest for help. He recommends her to get to a Salvation Army type place. There they let her have a shower, give her clean clothes and some Kotex, feed her and bring her to a health clinic. There she´s told that her body is run down and malnourished, but she doesn´t really care about this. All she can think about is how to get some drugs.
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